SMS No: 1
A vasectomy means never having to say you're sorry.
SMS No: 2
It's a recession when your neighbour loses his job: it's a depression when you lose yours.
SMS No: 3
There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
SMS No: 4
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
SMS No: 5
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils
SMS No: 6
Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
SMS No: 7
"I'm an excellent housekeeper. Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house."
SMS No: 8
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
SMS No: 9
"Never stand between a dog and the hydrant."
SMS No: 10
"Cheese… milk's leap toward immortality."
SMS No: 11
100. "Isn't your pants' zipper supposed to be in the front?"
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